BACKLASH With Prisca Sam-Duru: The rise and rise of sexual immorality
I remember a woman in my home town- she’s late now, who was a complete drunk. His little son also took to drinking kaikai,(local gin). Because of her condition, two of her relatives started having sex with her- that was a taboo. Soon, her little son joined his uncles in the incestuous exercise. That was the height of sacrilege and she paid dearly for living such dirty life. That was in the 90s. The boy is all grown up now but the main thrust of the tale is that the woman’s case was about the only case of incest that was of course in the open, at the time.
What we have presently in Nigeria is mindboggling, soul-rendering and the height of moral decadence. On a daily basis we hear cases of rape, sexual molestation especially against minors by grandfathers. On the increase is the case of fathers raping their daughters, and I ask, for what purpose? I have just read on Vanguard, the story of a father who slept with the daughter for 4 years; it goes with the title, “My father had sex with me for 4 years, said it’s not a sin” Can you imagine such wickedness? This is so disgusting.
The case of late Ochanya Ogbanje will never be forgotten. It is a sad history. A father and his son both raped the little girl through every available space. It is devastating! Paedophilia has reached an alarming stage in a country where many claim to know and worship the Almighty God. What has happened to Nigeria? Why are paedophiles increasing by the day? A 68 year old man for instance, raping a 4 month old baby. Oh my God? There are things not worth mentioning. You know girls have always been blamed whenever rape occurs, for indecent dressing; no doubt, there’s craze for too much exposure of vital areas of the body. But you can’t help but wonder what is attractive in the body of a 4month or 1 year old baby girl’s body. At this juncture, one cannot help but conclude that the perpetrators of these dastardly acts do so either for ritual purposes or because they are psychopaths. Also, many of them must have become crazy due to addiction to hard drugs.
In other words, these sexual perverts need to be locked up for life.
The social media went on rampage the previous week with the COZA pastor, Fatoyinbo and Busola Dakolo’s alleged rape scandal. The unrest continued physically as women especially, took to the street to protest against the pastor. I’ve always avoided commenting on such cases involving ministers of God because according to the Holy Bible, who I’m I to judge another man’s servant. So whether the minister of God is genuine or not, let God be his judge. Too many questions for the duo involved in this sex saga. But the issue here is that the COZA pastor is not the first to face such allegations and may not be the last, considering how fast our values are being eroded in this 21st century. I remember the case of the young pastor in Igando area who was alleged to have had sex with young boys and paid them two thousand naira afterwards. The young pastor was later discovered to be HIV positive and may have distributed the virus to his prey. Some Imams and Alfas have also been in the news for allegedly raping minors in their care. Is it possible that all the accused are innocent? If they are guilty, then, we are in a world infested with sexual perverts! It is more disheartening when these inglorious acts are being perpetrated by grandfathers upon the amoral.
Boko Haram members kidnap women and children; rape them before killing or maiming them. Many women and children, who are their hostages, have been turned into sex slaves. Some Fulani herders who have allegedly been on rampage for some time now, have also been in the news for defiling their captives. Some Lecturers even professors who are revered in the society have also been convicted of sexual assault on their students who are young enough to be their own daughters. Fathers and guardians are busy ravaging their children and those in their custody most often with the mothers aware but helpless or ashamed to spill the bean. In all of this ugly development, I’m not sure if there has been any case of a mother raping her son. We only have rare cases of a woman raping a man or a boy. So what is wrong with men? Please don’t get this wrong. This exercise is not about gender but what truly is the problem with men that many of them are turning into sexual perverts on a daily basis? Why have they turned women into endangered species?
Rape must end now and if we are serious about seeing its end rather than it seeing our end, women have too much work to do in this regard. This is a time not to trust anybody when it comes to the subject matter under discussion. No more entrusting your children be they girls or boys, to neighbours. Women must be bold to confront their husbands when they discover that they are raping their daughters. They must speak out and end this evil. Women must as a matter of urgency resume their jobs as mothers who will watch over their daughters properly even if they are career mums. Let’s not leave the job of caring for our daughters and in fact, children, to the teachers and house helps.
Women must be ready at all times to answer this question; what kind of boys are you bringing up in this 21st century? We tend to believe that the girls should be trained properly to become good wife materials but fail to also nurture the boys into becoming good husband materials. If moral values are inculcated in the boys same way it is done in the girls, we will definitely not have rape cases like we do today.
Sometimes I feel this country has no National Orientation Agency; if we do have, then its time it begins to work towards helping to change the mindset of individuals. It is high time people understood the negative impact of rape on victims and the society in general.
And then, the Police: most often they have been accused of scuttling a clear case and the victim becomes the culprit. They openly accuse a rape victim of seduction; we will definitely get nowhere if this continues.
I must salute the job of some NGOs and the social media family for screaming so loud whenever a case crops up thereby, mounting pressure on the authorities to give justice to victims.
The issue of rape is occupying an unwarranted space in the polity; a space that must be shrunk with immediate effect. And to do so requires our collective efforts.